Ever since the automobile started to gain traction in popular culture around the turn of the 20th century, it has, in one way or another, captured the imagination of just about everyone. With the advent and adoption of standard automotive equipment, the average vehicle adopted a basic shape and look, which aside from some notable experiments, generally remains to this day.
Interestingly, out of our fascination with cars grew a comparison between automobiles and the human anatomical form. This has since been perpetuated through countless cartoons, movies, and television depictions. Think "Herbie the Love Bug" or "Knight Rider," and the image of a vehicle as a dynamic character quickly comes to mind.
While the similarities between a person and car are comical at best, there are some parallel physical attributes that do stand out. Headlights, especially of the rounded variety, are almost always portrayed as eyes. The motor is often considered a "heart," the bumper makes a good "mouth," and the gas tank is presumably a stomach. As for the horn, well, I will leave that one up to you to decide. I, however, would like to suggest that the automobile has become so intertwined with our psyche, that the potential likeness between our two species extends well beyond form into function.
For example: You can have your arteries roto-rootered, just like you can have your fuel system flushed. I suppose the combination of weight training and a suntan might have similar affects to "buffing out" a paint job, the same way a good diet, exercise, and regular checkups can lead to safe, dependable operation. One additional resemblance, while more rare, seems to best capture the essence of our collective "underbodies."
A host of electronic gadgetry, including things like engine management (brain) and fuel injection (cardiovascular) systems invariably control the modern vehicle (man). Right up through the disco era, however, carburetors ruled the day. One annoying if funny product of general carburetion is the "backfire" (I am working on a dance move for that).
This condition is most often characterized by small amounts of unburned fuel seeping into the exhaust system where is collects. When the engine does fire next, the fuel ignites, often with dramatic flare.
Sounds like time for a muffleroscopy.
If you have ever experienced a lull in a mid-morning meeting, or a quiet movie with a new girlfriend, you have likely experienced the human equivalent. Enter the "furt," a phenomenon quite literally somewhere in between stomach grumbling and outright flatulence.
Like the backfire, the furt is very unpredictable, and every bit as difficult to control. Generally, it's best to just let nature take its course and suffer through some embarrassment, because trying to influence it can only exacerbate the situation. Shift one way (step on the gas), and you may drown out the sound. Shift incorrectly, though, and it becomes the digestive equivalent of a Chris Botti trumpet solo.
There really is no better way to clear a room. Or a parking lot.
The similarities don't end there. What more is a doctor if not a human mechanic, anyway? Aside from slightly different greases and lubricants, even the tools used to address this issue in humans are largely the same as those used on cars.
As a matter of fact, the only real dissimilarities I have come up with are the trivial disparity between a grave- and junkyard, or the issue of limited factory warranties. For this I have just one word: Stem-cell research.
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Posted by: Annie | September 07, 2006 at 07:37 AM